Louie and I had been planning to make our family’s return to
the US in January 2014; which we accomplished on schedule. I am writing a few paragraphs to
share insight about our life routine in China just prior to our US return. There are many things I love about each
country. I must admit though, I will not
miss the Guangzhou traffic or the testing and homework pressure of China’s
schools
J!
I’ve picked a typical day, happening about three months
prior to our return. We thought it was
right time for the nanny to leave and started looking for a new job in order to move on with her life. I would get up at 6:00 or before and start to cook breakfast. I thought I forgot to cook as we had the nanny before Selena, our oldest was born. Then I realized nothing was impossible, lol
J! Girls like to eat ham and eggs with toast. I also cooked noodles with soup. Sometimes I cooked congee with dumplings or steamed buns. The wakeup call was 6:30A, breakfast time was 7:00A, and we tried to leave home at 7:20 which allowed the least amount of time on the road (20 minutes) to get to school. During this last year in China, Selena was in a different campus from her two sisters. I would go to Selena’s school first, especially
on the days I was too lazy to cook. Sometimes we ate at the McDonald's which was
right across the street from her school.
Selena would walk across the street
to school and I would take Liane and Jasmine to another campus. By the time we would get to the lower grade’s
campus, there were always already lots of cars on the street in front of the
school. This was a very busy street and
it was really narrow, with two-way traffic and many people doing “illegal”
parking. Sometimes people would have to
drop off their kid in the middle of the road.
Sometimes I would run into traffic jams and had to stop wherever I could
to let the girls get out. There was always
a lot of people walking, lots of cars and lots of students. It was hectic and crowded. By the time we would get to the second campus, it could be already 8:00A. The
school bell rings right at that time.
I clearly remember one time I was totally stuck and caused a
huge traffic jam. There was a lot of
illegal parking that morning; there were garbage cans right at the crossroad
and also there was construction going on.
All of a sudden, a car was stopping right in front of me. It blocked the entrance area. Since I saw no cars were coming from the other
side, I tried to pass by him quickly.
Right at the moment a Mercedes drove toward me. I tried to back up, but that didn’t work -- a
car parked right behind me, and the garbage cans were blocking the area too. There was no way for me to back up and get
out of the blockade. The driver jumped
out of the Mercedes and yelled at me. I
told him that he would have to back up and let me pass, otherwise both ways
were jammed. He did not want to do that,
and ended up calling a policeman. The policeman came and yelled at me, I told
him, I had a car stop right in front of me (not moving) and a car park right behind
me. The other car would have to back up!!
I was totally stuck in the middle. After the Mercedes driver backed up, I drove
by him, I opened the window and told him “I am sorry, but Mercedes does not
have its own lane.”
The traffic usually was better coming home. I had a choice to either go to the gym on the
way home
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or go home to park my car and walk along the river bank. Gym opened at 8:00 am, I was usually the first
one to get there. I usually liked
walking outside along the river better, as it was more scenic. There were many people exercising in the morning along the river People would be doing Tai Chi, street dance, running or walking. There was always lots of people and music. My goal was to walk 10 kilometers every day. I plugged in my earphones, tuned to my phone
for music and walked 5 kilometers each way.
That was the quiet and private time for me and the walking was
absolutely scenic. I would see sights
like the famous XingHai Music Hall and the Art Museum from across the river on
the Ersha Island. I would walk under Guangzhou Bridge, past the Asian Game
Stadium, thelandmark Guangzhou TV Tower, LieDe Bridge and walk toward Pazhou
Bridge. It was totally
relaxing and
enjoyable. There was this bicycle rental
“dak” for people to “rent” bikes for
free. Because it was about 4 kilo from
home, I did not want to come back all the way back to return the bike. I was talking to this young guy about if I
could return the bike at another dak spot along the river. He apologized and told me that would break
the rules. I was just curious why he
worked there, I thought he
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| Bike Rental "Dak" |
was the college student of Dr. Sun-Yatsen University
(which is located right by our place), or maybe just a volunteer. He told me actually he met a girl before when
they both came to pick up bikes from here, he wanted to find her again so he applied for the job
here. He came from countryside, his home
was far away. Since then, I thought of
him and his “love” story whenever I passed by any daks. People sometimes came from different places
to meet for a good reason I guess.
After my morning exercise (1 hour 40 minutes), I usually go
back home to work. We lived in a nice
apartment complex in the city. People
drove very expensive cars and dressed nicely.
At the entrance, I greeted the guards.
Right by the gate, this flower man was sitting there almost every
morning. Louie usually bought flower
from him, 20-25 yuan a bunch, and a lot cheaper than in the store. He smiled every time when you walked by, it
was almost impossible to just pass by. I
was not sure if it was legal to sell flower without a license at that location.
Sometimes he would leave and take his
bicycle walking around the neighborhood.
Other than my husband, the security guards, he probably was the man I saw
almost every day regardless the weather was cold, hot or rainy. I am sure he has a family to raise and his
wife and children were waiting for him to go home every day with food and
hopefully some money left for saving.
I took a nap after lunch, which was the supplement to my
late working hours at night to match the US time zone. I still kept that habit even after I started
to be able to sleep at 10:00P and didn’t work a night shift. Louie and I had a little tea time after
napping before I went to pick up girls.
Because all three girls have different schedules, whoever got off earliest
went to swim in the school pool. The
pickup time was 5:00 pm, Selena would walk to the other campus to meet us (as
walking was fast than
driving between the two campuses during rush hour).
I sometimes went to this French Restaurant by
school called “These Three” for coffee.
The owners are three brothers in their 60’s (I heard they were not
married and just lived together as a family), the oldest brother is in charge
of inventory, middle one is a chef and the youngest one is a coffee
“lover”. All of them went to Vietnam and
France and lived there for a long time before moving back
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| Guangzhou TV Tower |
to China. Chef Ken speaks good English and French. Every single time when I was there, he was
reading some cooking magazines. We
sometimes would chat a bit and he let me try the new dishes he was making. The youngest brother is funny, he likes to
talk about coffee, and he would feed my girls chocolates whenever they were
around. Overall, it was like a waiting
place for me and the girls. Selena liked
to order the onion bread there. The girls sometimes ate with the staff to try
their food before the restaurant put out a new dish. We were like their best “repeat” customers --
or maybe more like friends, or something in between. I kind of liked the feeling --very cozy.
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| Xianghai Music Hall |
We would get home around 6:00 pm and the night was pretty busy
with homework. Louie loves to cook, so
he always made supper, and we usually started eating around 7:30 pm. By this time, the girls had not finished
homework, as they have several hours each night. After dinner, usually another 1-1:30 hours to
complete school assignments before taking a shower and getting ready for
bed. 10:00 pm was the goal to turn off
the light. But usually we all ended up
going to bed at 10:30 when Xinghai Music Hall’s most beautiful neon lights went
off. At the same time, the lights along the river bank went off too. The night became quiet. There were times Selena and I would lie down
on the couch and read another 30 minutes before we all were exhausted and fell
asleep. Although the night was not long, when the day broke, it was time to start the next day!
It has been 24 years since the last time I was on stage. I had a solo performance in a Korean dance called "Dancing in Autumn" last month. That date was also the celebration of the 20th anniversary of the Hengda dancing school It also happened to fall during Louie’s recent month long absence when he traveled to Tibet. Being a “single” mom (temporarily) with three children, in addition to work, cooking, cleaning and chauffeuring the girls around for after school activities, it was extra busy with the addition of the group and private lessons. One might wonder whey I decided to take the assignment. It really felt like it was the right and especially appropriately timed opportunity for me.
You see, it was that 14 years ago when I first learned the same dance. Then, I found that I was pregnant with Selena, our oldest daughter back in early 2002.
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Jasmine, my youngest daughter, and I have just returned from a short visit to China. It was a fun whirlwind of a time. It is the first time she and I have traveled for such a distance, having extended “mom and daughter” time. This purpose of this trip was to attend and participate in the ceremonies to announce the Top Ten Children’s Songs and Top Ten Young Performers in China. There were more than 175 performers participating in the show, showcasing more 120 original children’s songs. Though I received notice that Jasmine had been included in the Top Ten Child Performers in China, and that her song had also been chosen among the Top Ten Children’s Songs, I did not want to spoil her surprise. I waited until she was on stage and it was announced on live TV during the awards show the evening of January 10th . That is when she found out the news. It was hard to resist telling her ahead of time, particularly during the ceremonies, when she asked me if I thought she had a chance, but I wanted her just experience the moment and enjoy the surprise. 
The reason for this opportunity originated while we were still living in Guangzhou during 2012. Jasmine has always loved to sing, and she had been taking voice lessons and it was recommended for her to make a short album. She chose a song about happiness by Han Chun, a well-known song writer. The song received quite a lot of air play. Similar to the US, there is a “billboard chart” of popular songs, this particular one is somewhat new and it is centered on children’s songs. Her album began to climb this children’s song billboard. It climbed the charts for several weeks, rising from number 18, 13, 11, 9 to 7. It was then number 2 in the country for two weeks and spent one week at number one in the country. In fact, for eight weeks between June 1st and July 20, her song was listed among the top 20, and was receiving about 20,000 daily hits. 
So, all of this led her to being invited the awards ceremony in January. This awards show included several different types of awards, such as Top Ten Composers; Best Female singer; etc. She was included in the two categories of Top 10 Songs and Top 10 Singers. In fact, Jasmine is one of the youngest singers to be listed on the Top 20 songs, which is quite fun for her. Although just eight years old, she is a rather relaxed and calm personality, though once she gets on stage to perform, she seems to “blossom” and become quite the performer. I’m including a number of photos from the evening’s event and some “selfies” she and I took along the journey. The master of ceremonies asked her several questions during the evening and asked if she preferred to speak English or Mandarin, to which Jasmine replied “Either one is fine” and he was quite taken with that!
Our short trip was a delightful time of mom and daughter togetherness time. We crammed our
time completely full to be able to see as many friends and also family as possible. My aunt and also my mom were able to come to the festivities and Jasmine was able to see a few China school friends. Wow, it was a whirlwind time of delightful fun. It was also a glimpse into my daughter’s growing personality, as she seemed to take it all rather casually and simply and just enjoyed the experience on the red carpet at the awards equal to the fun she had seeing her school chums and visiting family. I was not only proud of her for her accomplishment, but also how calm and grounded she was during all the commotion of the ceremonies, autographs and pictures. What an honor and delight that we got to do this -- and though it was hard to keep the secret – it was fun to watch her find out! This experience will always hold a special place in my heart, as does Jasmine!
For me, two memorable events happened this fall. First of all, I traveled and visited the FCC group in Vancouver, BC. Also accompanying me was Jenni “Fang” Lee of the documentary “Somewhere Between”. Though we had talked on the phone previously, this was our first in-person meeting. Spending time with Fang was as delightful as I had anticipated! While she spoke to FCC kids, I spoke to adults; then I was able to hear her perspective as an adult adoptee and appreciate her experiences of traveling back to China 14 times following her adoption. Her discussion/ Q&A time with parents was compelling. I also was able to share about our family’s experience of living in China for the past six years. There were lots of rewarding experiences to discuss about living between two cultures.
in order to raise funds for providing medical support to children in China. Lotus Travel was one of the key sponsors of this event. Our youngest daughter, Jasmine was honored to sing a beautiful Chinese song at the VIP reception of the event, and it was a rich time with Holt families, board members and friends at Holt. I recently read (in Chinese) that provided a comprehensive overview of China adoption during the last twenty years. Mr. and Mrs. Holt were highlighted in the article as the pioneers of international adoption. All of this caused me to stop and consider how fortunate we have been. Louie and I started working with families twenty years ago, about the time that adoptions from China began to get started. We have been involved in a very personal way, with helping families connect and travel to meet their child for whom they earnestly worked and waited. This opportunity – to be in the midst of this life-changing journey for so many – has enriched us immeasurably. I wish you and yours the very best this coming year!